And for tonight...

Last week at church, someone said "Congratulations!  I saw pictures of your daughter!"  My first thought was, "I don't have a daughter."  It is still very surreal that she is ours.  We know that nothing is final until we have her in our arms, but this time, it just feels like it's really going to happen.  She is 11,500 miles away from us, but somehow, everything keeps falling into place and we believe that Amber Joy will soon be home in Tennessee! 

This week, we got a brief update that she has gained a pound in just two weeks!  She has a healthy appetite, a good set of lungs that can be heard all through the house, and according to her medical records from the hospital, she is quite the little fighter.  She has some medical and other issues still to overcome, but we are hopeful, simply because of the way she has rebounded so far.  

I have found myself day dreaming about the time when we get her home, the days at the zoo, first day of kindergarten, her first crush, high school graduation, what she'll want to be when she grows up, and all of the days in between as we work on becoming a family.  

I must write about one of the things that Justin said...he is more private about his emotions, but on the day he went into the bank to get the loan so that we can pay all of the adoption costs, he walked up to the teller and, after he was asked "Can I help you?," he replied, while showing a picture of Amber Joy, "I need to bring her home."  He has talked about being excited about taking her to Disney World (and if you know Justin, you know that is a miracle)!  

We have both had our emotional moments at the thought that this journey might finally be coming to an end.  After so many tears, preparing a nursery that has been empty for almost a year, and watching so many friends have babies, it seems that is finally our turn.  We know that if Amber Joy had come into our lives one second sooner than she did, we do not feel we would have been ready.  This is where faith comes in.  And for us, parenthood will be that much sweeter.  We know each other so much better than we did five years ago when we got married.  We have been able to figure out what is really important to us.  If you had asked me a year ago if I was glad we had to deal with infertility, of course, my answer would be no.  But now, honestly, I would have to say that our trust in God's wisdom has increased, and that we are so glad we waited for Amber Joy.  She has already changed our lives forever.  If we hadn't come this far, she never would have come into our lives.  

Who really knows how God works?  That's why he's God and we're not.  I'm just a happy mommy right now and we know that she was meant to be our little girl from the beginning.  Now, we can see.   


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